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Title/Topic: Eating Disorders About More Than Self Image
Posted On: 11/13/2010
 
November 13, 2010 (OnMilwaukee.com) –

By Sarah Foster

Most of us look in the mirror and can immediately find a couple things we don’t like about our appearance. Maybe it’s our chin, breast size or a couple wrinkles that weren’t there a few years ago. For some, we just lament the fact that we were born this way, spending money on expensive creams and move on grudgingly.

But what happens to those whose brain gets caught in a compulsive cycle with potentially fatal results?

Numerous studies have found that, in the United States, as many as 10 million females and a million males are fighting a life and death battle with eating disorders like anorexia or bulimia. Millions more are struggling with binge eating disorder.

Eating disorders are rarely about just looks. Like many addictive behaviors there are underlying issues making their way to the surface as an obsession with eating and weight. Anorexia is often thought of as associated with a very controlling, strict lifestyle or family dynamic. Bulimia is thought to be the opposite. Like the chaotic cycle of binging and purging, the lifestyle and surrounding environment of the individual is usually very chaotic and irregular.

Two new television series recently put eating disorders in the spotlight. E!’s series “What’s Eating You?: Fear, Food and Obsession,” and “Obsessed,” an A&E; series about obsessive-compulsive disorders (this show covers many OCDs, not just those involving food and weight). Both look into the lives of individuals suffering from obsessive compulsive disorders involving body image.

I recently had the opportunity to reconnect with a high school friend who has struggled with eating disorders for a decade. She agreed to talk to me about her struggle and recovery in the hope that it may help others fighting the same demons. For reasons of personal and medical privacy, the names in this article have been changed.

“Jessica” was always a fit, tomboy type until she hit puberty and was the first girl in her grade to develop breasts, an awkward nuisance that made playing sports with the boys a constant reminder that her body was changing. Other than the frustration, she didn’t pay so much attention to her changing physique and instead, like many young girls, spent far more time dissecting each and every aspect of her face that made her feel less than the girls on the cover of Teen Cosmo.

OnMilwaukee.com: When did your general teenage discomfort with your body turn into something that might be considered an obsession or a disorder?

“Jessica:” I played high school basketball my freshman and sophomore years and was in good shape. We had two-a –day practices so my metabolism was really high. Other than the fact that I had boobs and high school boys seem intrigued by those no matter what they look like or who they’re attached to, I didn’t think much about my body or weight. Then in my junior year of high school, a boy I knew said to me, ‘You look good. Last year you were getting a little chubby.’ From that moment I realized other people were conscious, not just of how my looks stacked up against other girls, but whether or not I had gained or lost weight. That was a new and freaky feeling.

Later that year I broke up with my high school sweetheart and it was devastating. I wasn’t eating much anyway out of being so upset, but one day, I can remember it like it was yesterday, I ate a cracker. Just one cracker and before I could swallow it, for some reason I just leaned over the sink and spit it out. I have absolutely no idea what caused me to do this, but that was the moment that everything changed.

OMC: When did things really start to register with you that this was more than a phase or you just being upset about your relationship ending?

J: When I went away to college, it felt like a disaster. I was away from home, drinking all the time, eating all the time and everything felt like it was out of my control. I was trying so hard to fill the voids and fears I had and I didn’t know that I should or, I guess, I didn’t really want to reach out for help. The following summer things got really bad. I was purging everything. My skin was grey, I could barely stay awake, my throat burned all day long, and it just kept getting worse. Nothing felt good. Eating and binging both made me feel like a failure. They both felt horrible and yet, I did them both every day, much of the day.

OMC: Did you share with any friends or family what you were going through? Did you ever get the help you needed so badly?

J: I didn’t really want to share any of this with anyone. It was embarrassing and hard to live with day in and day out. I think most people around me knew something was very wrong but didn’t know how to help me or approach me. I’m sure I looked like a ticking time bomb. I did see a therapist for a while after my parents found out what I was doing and immediately sent me to my doctor. I’m sure it helped immensely to talk to someone about everything that had been going on, but I think I needed more help than anyone knew. Imagine being bent over the toilet with snot, throw up and perhaps even blood running down your face. Imagine throwing up ’til you thought your insides were going to burst into flame. There is no way you can put your body and your brain through that for month after month and be thinking clearly. I was off in another realm all together and I needed very intense help. I never felt I got that.

OMC: Were there moments that you would describe as ‘whoa moments’ in which you realized how dangerous your behavior was becoming?

J: I had a few eye-opening moments but when you’re that messed up it’s hard to see them for what they really are. I had been taking Ipecac (Ipecac is used to induce vomiting in cases of accidental ingestion of a foreign or harmful object or substance.) to throw up rather than cramming my fingers down my throat. My parents found out and I thought my dad might actually kill me. He knew how dangerous it was for me to be doing this and the look on his face convinced me never to use it again, but it didn’t stop me from purging on my own.

OMC: Are you noticing side effects from your years of dealing with your eating disorder?

J: I’ve always prided myself on having great teeth. Everyone tells me I have great teeth and a great smile and I love that. I never had braces and never had a cavity until late in college. My dentist has told me that the acid damage to my teeth is causing sensitivity and decay. For awhile I had really severe acid reflux problems, my mouth was also really sensitive due to the continuous exposure to stomach acid. I worry that I haven’t seen the worst of the damage. I hope that I got things under control before I did too much permanent damage but I fear that I won’t know until things start going wrong.

OMC: Do you feel like you’ve recovered from your eating disorder?

J: I don’t think I’ll ever be one hundred percent ‘recovered’ from it. I think it’s always going to be a work in progress and that every week, month and year that I can say I haven’t participated in my obsessive compulsive behavior is a good thing. But I can’t tell you that I don’t think about it all the time. I do. Every day and meal and glance in the mirror is a struggle. Some days are better than others, and again, I feel like each day, I’m further from the person I once was, being totally controlled by this disorder, but I don’t think that feeling of fear of losing control over the disorder will ever go away completely.

OMC: What was it that helped you begin that recovery process?

J: What helped me the most was having a support structure. When you have people surrounding you that don’t care if you’re thin, don’t care what you weigh and you feel like you can only be yourself around them, you can start to snap out of that cycle of self hate. I have to work on it constantly, but I did manage to slowly break free from those obsessions.
 

 
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar linmonclerwhite  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar linmonclerwhite  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar linmonclerwhite  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar linmonclerwhite  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar linmonclerwhite  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar linmonclerwhite  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar ndgeonchon  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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no avatar linmonclerwhite  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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Posted: 8/17/2013 9:22:45 AM GMT
 
the north face outlet | the north face outlet | the north face outlet online CAN CHIU WIN CALIFORNIA’S TOP LGBT SEAT? By Samson Wong – August 15, 2013 Posted in: Columns , Politics , Potstickers by Samson Wongnorthface  the north face outlet online sale  the north face sale  Chinatown’s Portsmouth Square last May with S an Francisco District Attorney George Gascon and saint of the elders — S elf-Help for the Elderly’s director Anni Chung — a nice duo to hang with Board of Supervisor President David Chiu , as all three passed out recyclable bags warning seniors about blessing scams. That along with Chiu’s major ethics proposal last April in partnership with City Attorney Dennis Herrera is positioning the straight, three time board president to run for state’s most prominent LGBT State Assembly seat — San Francisco’s eastside 17th District now held by Tom Ammiano , terming out at the end of 2014…SF Board of Supervisors President David Chiu, passing out shopping bags to educate residents about blessing scams, has led the fight against 8 Washington condo development.CAMPOS ENTERS RACE: Chiu’s work with former police chief Gascon and Herrera — respectively city’s top criminal and civil prosecutors – represent potential trump cards in a foreseen 17th District Assembly race against District 9 (Mission) gay Supervisor David Campos . The progressive earlier this month declared his bid for the 17th District seat, rallying the LGBT political moderate to progressive spectrum – securing Ammiano’s blessing as his successor and forming a steering committee of Health Commissioner Cecilia Chung, mayor’s homeless director and former Supervisor Bevan Dufty (former District 8 — Upper Market/Castro), Harvey Milk LGBT Democratic Club President Tom Temprano and Human Rights Commission Director and former Alice B. Toklas LGBT Democratic Club co-chair Teresa Sparks . It’s a unity message that the next 17th District legislator to Sacramento must come from the LGBT community, following the seat’s previous LGBT occupants – Carole Migden, Mark Leno and Ammiano. It’s tantamount to unofficially declaring the heavily APA westside 19th District to be an Asian Pacific American (APA) seat represented by Leland Yee, Fiona Ma and now Phil Ting …However, APAs could argue dibs on LGBT District 17 also, given the APA cultural hubs of Little Saigon, Chinatown, Manilatown and Japantown…California Controller candidate Betty Yee, John Burton and former Assembly Pro Tempore Speaker Fiona Ma. Photo courtesy of Fiona Ma.RAISING CHECKS TO SIGN CHECKS: California Controller candidate Betty Yee , without an opponent now that Treasurer Bill Lockyer will not vie for the post, is filling her 2014 campaign gas tank with $471,777 as of June 30 according to her semiannual Fair Political Practices Commission report. Given her May fundraiser (see “Potstickersâ€? on 7/4/13 at tinyurl.com/kahtst3 ), the Democrat was willing to criticize popular Governor Jerry Brown — a move that could follow outgoing Controller John Chiang ’s (he signs state checks and is running for Treasurer in ‘14) blueprint of independence rebuking Democratic legislature and Republican Governor over balancing state budget. Yee could be readying herself for not only a Republican challenger, but also a very partisan Democrat raising tons of money from special interests for the state race…NEW PEREZ: All that money and not running for anything in 2014? Assembly Speaker John Perez has taken papers to run for Lt. Governor in 2018 — when Gavin Newsom is termed out. But one wonders what the LA legislator is really thinking, squirreling a leftover war chest of $1.07 million from his 2012 re-election for Assembly and just under $300,000 for 2018 Lt. Governor’s campaign. The final month of the legislative session will be telling especially if Perez moderates himself more and goes beyond his four L’s constituencies — labor, Latino, LGBT and Los Angeles which make him appear very liberal…The former California Labor Federation political director Perez has beaten the business drums as he did in SF Chinatown in March (See “Potstickersâ€? on 3/28/13 at tinyurl.com/c8hmwxs ). And again in an Aug. 4 LA Times online story, he emphasized business at the top of the legislature’s agenda like reforms to California’s unemployment insurance after enacting pro-business sales-tax credits. Surprisingly, he didn’t see consensus for raising the minimum wage, a stance business will like despite Perez’s labor DNA. The final weeks of the legislative session between now and September could reposition Perez as more moderate to run for a statewide office for next year…DAVID VS. DAVID: In a 19th Assembly race, The District 3 (Chinatown/North Beach) Supervisor David Chiu could edge Sup. Campos having served as former prosecutor and counsel for the US Senate Judiciary Committee and being shortlisted in early 2011 by Mayor Gavin Newsom for DA appointment before Gascon’s selection. Campos’ legal vitae includes tenures as former deputy city attorney and SF School Board counsel. Campos filed to run for State Assembly with the backdrop of children and youth and former school board member and teacher Tom Ammiano — an indicator that education will be a major campaign plank. Meanwhile, Chiu recently offered legislation calling for business to support flexible work schedules for employees with kids….CAMPOS MINE FIELD: But Campos faces land mines Chiu could exploit. This spring, a 10-year old $15 million funds diversion scandal surfaced in DA Gascon’s prosecution of six former and current SFUSD personnel (four executives including an Associate Superintendent). While prosecution proceeds, there’s a question as to accountability of school leadership as to whether Campos could have prevented this as general school counsel from 2004 to 2008. Supposedly, SFUSD had implemented accounting safeguards since the misuse of over $100 million in bond money and downfall of corrupt and incarcerated associates of SF Superintendent Bill Rojas from 1992 to 1999 (See “Potstickersâ€? on 5/30/13 at tinyurl.com/la3tplr )… Also dogging Campos with women, he was one of four supervisors voting in 2012 to stopping SF Sheriff Ross Mirkarimi ’s removal by Mayor Ed Lee and supermajority of SF Supervisors over domestic violence incident. Chiu had voted for Mirkarimi’s removal…Assessor-Recorder Carmen ChuVACUUM TUBE AGE: Newbie Assessor-Recorder Carmen Chu , now officially unchallenged this November, will have time to replace her department’s fossil recordkeeping system based on COBOL, a business computer program dating back to the mid-20th century. Few programmers exist to write COBOL code… Chu will face re-election for a four-year term in Nov. 2014…YOU LOOK MARVELOUS: At Nov. election forum in Golden Gate Heights, Mary Jung called every appearing Nov. 2013 candidate incumbent the “best lookingâ€? for their respective offices — Assessor-Recorder Chu, District 4 (Sunset) Supervisor Katy Tang , Controller candidate Betty Yee and Board of Equalization aspirant Fiona Ma and City Treasurer Jose Cisneros , wearing his Sunday best to perform a wedding at the normally closed City Hall. No controversy for Jung unlike President Barack Obama drawing national grief and apologizing for characterizing former SF DA Kamala Harris for being nation’s “best lookingâ€? Attorney General to chagrin of fans of his AG Richard Holder ….Jung, the SF Democratic Party chair, was emceeing a joint Asian Pacific Democratic Club and Westside Chinese Democratic Club election forum at the Ma compound…‘SURVIVOR’ SUPERVISOR: Fiona Ma is stumping for Board of Equalization candidate and expressed her distaste for petty SF Board of Supervisors politics resembling reality “Survivorâ€? show competition with personalities and former colleagues like current union political director Chris Daly, ESL professor Jake McGoldrick , Public Defender Jeff Adachi ’s second in command Matt Gonzalez and ex-local Democratic Party chair Aaron Peskin …Meanwhile, Michelle Park Steel is terming out of her own BOE seat next year and seeking to make the beachhead of Orange County’s own “Survivorâ€? island by running for Board of Supervisors next June 2014. Although, she’ll be glad to let the FBI land first, given they’re sniffing around the board, which would help her election shot…north face jackets MISS ME?: Email Samson Wong at potsticker@prodigy.net and  follow him at Twitter @SFPotstickers …About the AuthorVeteran columnist has appeared in up to 450,000 households weekly in the SF Independent, Examiner (2000-04) and AsianWeek since 1996. As Editor-in-Chief (2003-07), AsianWeek and Samson received wide recognition from the California Legislature, New American Media, League of Women Voters, GLAAD, Organization of Chinese Americans, SPUR and APA civic groups. Thru the SF Citizens Advisory Committee on Elections, SF Elections Task Force and Chinese American Voters Education Committee, Wong helped boost APA influence from 25,000 in the 1980s to over 50,000 voters by the early 1990s.the north face outlet online north face jackets north face mens clothingthe north face outlet men’s shoes
 

 
no avatar linmonclerwhite  |  Time Zone: GMT Greenwich Mean
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